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Considering taking your own digital life? You just can't take the waiting time for the next OS update for one more day? Having trouble sleeping close to Keynotes?
Just Call the GUIside Hotline Right Now, and an Apple Fan Genius will ramble for 3 min. about how life is like on the dark side of the force, inside the evil castle in Redmond.
You'll feel much better, immediately. Guaranteed or a handshake.